How about:
StL Working Mom is a married mother of two, living in Charlottesville, working in St. Louis, living life like a Mentos dropped into Diet Coke.
A six feet tall* mother of two, she has a misguided penchant for high heels and short skirts.
STLWM enjoys good hair days, a successful blow-out and mullet free adventures.
STLWM is a writer, but you probably haven’t read anything she’s written, but hold your breath, that all-American novel’s bound to be right around the corner.
STLWM has two ginormous children who, hopefully, will continue to love her, otherwise they will grow up and crush her like a grape.
*I’m totally not six feet tall, but got so tired of men claiming to be 6′ or taller, looking me straight in the eye, or worse, up to me, insisting I must be 6′ tall. I gave up and just go with it, usually. In shoes I probably am 6′. I’m not going to argue a measurement.
That’s a long commute.