Although this did remind me that I had a male client hug me and give me the cheek kiss the other day. It was slightly uncomfortable but I roll with it.

You just keep on with your non-hugging self. I don’t find you unfriendly at all.

What makes me more uncomfortable, however, are the male friends that I have who are “cheek kissers.” Thankfully, I’ve never experienced this in a professional setting, but even among friends, I find it awkward. Whenever my husband and I go out socially with other couples, I have to remind myself that “John” is going to lean forward and kiss my cheek, so that I don’t jump away and make everyone uncomfortable.

As we become an increasingly multicultural society, I think this sort of thing will become a bigger issue.

I also believe that we all walk around with a personal space bubble that carries its own kind of presence. There is a real art to reading people and intuitively being able to “see” this bubble that surrounds other people, and wether it is okay to enter it or not.

There are some really fun exercises one can do with a partner both to help increase your sensitivity to other people’s space boundaries and also to project firm boundaries, or intentionally “soften” them. I’ve known several people who worked in really dangerous countries, and they all say that that one of the skills necessary in such an environment is to be able to render yourself “invisible” by using body language to manipulate the boundaries of your personal space. I don’t know how one would adapt this sort of thing to an office space, but I bet it could be done.

When I initiate the hug, I mean it. They are not to be given away lightly.

As for how I react when another wants a hug and I don’t? I give a stiff formal hug, hopefully clearly showing that I am not receptive to other hugs.