Women Supporting Women; The Catfight Stops Here
I’ve said before that I am not a political blogger. If you read this space at all you know that. Rarely do I wax political or share my opinions, but today, I’m fired up politically, for non-political reasons.
A friend of mine is running for office. She’s a mom, but really that’s irrelevant, just a fact for you to consider in a series of facts.
Recently, she’s been attacked by other moms for running for office. Why? Because she has young children and apparently, the local mom conventional wisdom is that it’s better to pursue your dreams when your children (and, consequently, you) are older.
This infuriates me to no end. My friend and her husband are both involved parents in their children’s lives. Her decision to run for office was and is a family decision. As an involved citizen, whether she runs for office or not is also irrelevant to the argument. She works, networks and serves. It makes her happy, fulfilled and in fact, a better mother because of it. Her husband is far happier being a caregiver to the children. Running around meeting people, making a difference in the community – it’s simply not his bag.
And let’s just consider this: is it that she’s running for office in particular? Is that why? Are moms who are going to night school or working a second job to help support the family criticized for improving their lives? We should criticize someone willingly making a sacrifice to improve our community? Shame on those mothers who dare to criticize the mother, or in fact, simply the woman, trying to do more. This is the kind of conversation that is never raised when a man is taking on additional responsibility, traveling or running for office.
We should all be aghast that in 2007 there is this gender bias, particularly on the grassroots level of local politics. What progress have we made in enabling women; capable, smart, valuable women such as my friend to contribute to our communities. We should be instead asking her how we can help. We should be bringing casseroles, inviting her children to playdates and above all bolstering her spirit with YES YOU CAN messages and WE WILL SUPPORT YOU because you are one of us, and when the day comes when we want to do something outside the “norm” we don’t want anyone telling us no, or that we should wait because postponing dreams is the very first step to making sure they never are realized.
April 13th, 2007 at 9:58 pm
“Recently, she’s been attacked by other moms for running for office. Why? Because she has young children and apparently, the local mom conventional wisdom is that it’s better to pursue your dreams when your children (and, consequently, you) are older.”
Attacked by how many other moms, exactly? You know, because one or two or five or even ten women swiping their cat claws at your friend for running for office, doesn’t mean that the “the local mom conventional wisdom” is that women with young children shouldn’t run for office. You might just be getting a bit carried away, there. Do you have any data to support this implication that the majority of local moms of young kids (or local moms period, or local women period, or anyone, really) feel critical towards Holly/Jen for running when they have kids at home? The more I think about this whole “controversy” the more I think it’s just a mountain being made out of a pile of kitty litter. Someone meowed and now we’re acting like there’s some big movement afoot to slam young moms who seek elected office in Central Virginia. I’d like to see something to back up the assertion that any significant number of people actually hold the view that you’re calling “the local mom conventional wisdom.” One or two or ten comments does not a conventional wisdom make. Thank god.