Ready for prom.

Needs a haircut.

I wake up every morning and think, “There’s so much I want to do!”

Today brought the opportunity to start doing one of the items on my list; helping to solve the homeless problem in the Charlottesville community. Today I was elected to the board of People and Congregations Engaged in Ministry (PACEM). I became familiar with PACEM when my church hosted homeless guests over the first two winters we have lived in Charlottesville. I learned more about the organization while working on the www.voicesofpoverty.org project when we interviewed homeless guests and PACEM director Dave Norris for a podcast series devoted to the poverty problem in our community.

I’m excited about the opportunity to contribute what I know about community relations, media strategy, development techniques and strategic planning to help this worthwhile organization.

There’s so much I want to do!

Scott Young has 20 Ways to Stay Productive While Working at Home.

When people find out my office is in my house, they often say they couldn’t work at home, that they’d get too distracted.

I think if it’s your lifestyle, and working at home is a permanent situation, you make adjustments. You adapt. Distractions are avoided. It does take discipline, though and as I’ve said before, it’s really not for everyone.

1. I will schedule and commit to mental health breaks on a quarterly basis. These can include but are not limited to something as small as a nap, a pedicure, an afternoon of reading a book (or baking, or watching TV) or as extensive as a day spent by yourself (or with your significant other).
2. I will not hesitate to seek help when I need it so I can focus on doing my job at work or at home better. I will not be ashamed or feel guilty because darn it, nobody can do it all and frankly, who wants to? 
1. This includes hiring help around the house and/or childcare.
3. I will ASK. Instead of struggling along, letting things drop and being consumed by pressure I will ask my employer, my child, my spouse, my friends, my colleagues to look at another approach that will work for me and ultimately, them.
4. I will take sick days when I’m sick, not just when my children are.
5. I will forgive myself for not being perfect.
6. I will boldly drop off store-bought treats for the class, buy the commercial Halloween costume, order out for dinner and dust only when absolutely necessary, unapologetically — because I know it’s in the interest of preserving my sanity.
7. I will be honest when a dear friend asks how I’m balancing it all.
8. I will use the Buckets method of prioritizing and establish “Events Not to be Missed,” such as children’s concerts, birthdays, recitals and on the work side, new business meetings, company retreats and professional development opportunities. 
1. When there are conflicts, I will bow my head and pray/wish/hope for guidance. 
9. If I don’t love my job, but I need to work, I will look and network until I find the opportunity that makes it all worth it.
1. I will not stay in a job where I am not valued.
10. I will re-evaluate my work life balance on a regular basis and when it’s out of whack, I will acknowledge it and take the necessary steps to change.

What else will you swear to do, as a working mom, as SAHM, a working parent or heck, just as a working person, to make yourself the most valuable contributor you can be?

Last night I went to my book club meeting at Cardinal Point Winery. We had a fabulous time discussing our latest selection, (when we got around to it) Laughter in the Dark. But before that, we caught up on each others’ lives.

One of the book clubbers recently interviewed for a job she knew she could get. It was perfectly suited to her talent and experience. She applied, and was brought in for an interview. Once they offered her the position, she said, “This is great, but I really don’t want to move and I am not ready to work full time.”

Wow.

So smart company that they are, they hired her anyway because she’s the perfect person to do the job. So what that she lives in another city? Who cares if she can do the job just as well in 30 instead of 40 hours?

Earlier the same day, a client shared the story of her team member who, after having her third child, was really struggling with full time work. Rather than looking for a new, part time job or just giving up to stay home, the team member asked her company to be flexible and to consider reducing her time by 60 percent. My client said the results have been fantastic. This valued team member stayed with the company and is more loyal than ever; she’s happier and more productive. The “extra” work has been distributed among colleagues who now have the opportunity to grow in their knowledge and capabilities.

Two fantastic stories about employers who hired or kept the person regardless of geography or time. Friends tease me about how I’m in love with my job, but this is why. It’s good to be valued for your brain, for whatever time you can give it, over whatever distance is required.

I have been in and out of Lambert Airport something like 26 times in the last 18 months. But who’s counting? I know it’s familiar because I recognize the smell. Eau de Lambert. It’s part red onions from California Pizza Kitchen but the rest is the scent of frustrated humanity.

Besides the smell, I know the faces of TSA agents, gate agents, ticket counter and baggage guys. They’ve become familiar to the point that I know who is likely to be working depending on the day I’m flying.

There’s one particular gate attendant that I like. He’s a real professional, with probably 35 years or more with the airline (I’m sure I heard him tell someone that earlier this year). Nothing phases this guy; he’s impossible to ruffle. He’s got a dry sense of humor and a stick of gum for every flight he loads.

Boarding my flight to Dulles, I was in line behind several Japanese businessmen. Just as we reached the ticket scanning machine it jammed. “It was made in Japan,” the gate agent said, not skipping a beat. The suits in front of me thought it was HILARIOUS, although one stooped to see if he could tell if it WAS a Japanese product.

The gate guy never cracked a smile. All business, he cranked everybody through despite the outdated scanner. When I fly, I always want that guy at my gate.

The girl answers cheerfully, “HI MOM!”

“Hi! How are you?”

“FINE. WANT TO HEAR THE FOUR HORRIBLE THINGS THAT HAPPENED TO ME TODAY?”

She was in quite a good mood despite the untimely demise of Peanut, the class guinea pig, the fact that her skirt ripped (someone was sitting on it, as they sat on the floor and she stood up), she hit her jaw (on someone’s head) and bit her tongue (IT HURTS TO EAT, she said).

Obviously, it didn’t hurt to talk yell on the phone.

Lo and behold, Dana gifted me with this:

And now I just can’t get over myself.

But I will, for a moment so I can bestow the honor upon Blackbird, who has heaps of admiration beaming at her from my direction.

Also? Sarabeth, whose posts about her father break my heart.

Bill Emory’s images make me think and wonder.

Have you read Self Made Mom? If you like me, you might like her, too.

And now I must go think and maybe even consider, a little.

I’ve written about my friend M. before, in a fit of anger over the cancer she’s battling, pressed down on a day when I could make no peace with reality. Tonight she dragged herself out for sushi, just because I’m in town — even though today was a new cycle of chemo — even though today was a BAD day.

She looks better that she did earlier this year, although she probably doesn’t believe me when I tell her so. It’s clear when she’s miserable. Tonight she couldn’t wait to get home. She was uncharacteristically quiet. I didn’t hear her drop an F-bomb once.

I worry . . . and that’s useless . . . but I’m not sure what else to do. Cancer disables so much more than one’s body; that much I’ve learned. I hug her like she might break and regret the miles between us, regret that I can’t see her but once in awhile. She knows, at least, that when I’m here she’s an unmovable appoinment on the agenda, that being with her cancels out all else, that seeing her is more important to me than anything else I might do while I’m in town.

Life. Friends. If we can just hang on a little longer.