I met a woman recently who was in the midst of a difficult divorce when her husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Given the circumstances, and while their relationship is not ideal, they’ve tabled the divorce. AND — you won’t believe it — but she’s his primary caregiver.
Another woman I know, divorced more than 30 years from her husband of only a few years, is helping him with end-of-life decisions.
It’s wild, isn’t it, what the universe asks of us in our relationships with other people.
I’ve learned a lot about love, forgiveness, letting go, and focusing on the future, especially in the last three years or so. I’m still learning and I’m sure I will be for a long time.
I don’t believe in holding grudges. I don’t believe in hating people. I don’t believe that any good comes from hanging on to anger — no matter how valid.
I’m not saying any of that comes easily. I have to work at it, for sure. But every time I make the decision to let go or forgive, I am better for it. A weight lifts.
I’ve read it many times and it’s true: we forgive NOT for the other person. There are situations where the other person may never even know they’re forgiven. They may not care. They may want to hurt you. It doesn’t matter — you don’t forgive them for them — you do it for YOU.
That’s some of what I’ve been thinking a lot about lately. I hope it helps someone else today.
More on forgiveness: